Don’t Call It a Deload

By Someone Who “Definitely Meant to Do That WOD”

Dear Athlete,

We see you. You’re the first to book a heavy barbell day, you’re suspiciously “busy” when the rig is involved, and if handstand walks are on the whiteboard, you’re suddenly “focusing on mobility.” This book is for you...and every one of us who has ever picked a workout based on vibes instead of what we actually need.

What follows is a humorous, lightly confronting look at a week in the life of a classic cherry picker. It’s not meant to shame (okay, maybe just a little)...it’s here to help you laugh, reflect, and maybe, just maybe, start tackling the things that will actually make you a better athlete.

Spoiler alert: It might involve showing up to gymnastics day.

Enjoy the ride.

Day 1 – Monday: Barbell Therapy

Squat cleans on the board. I put on my best knee sleeves and worst decision-making skills. Hit a PR. Coach said to focus on form. I focused on intensity. Didn’t read the rest of the workout until I was already sweating from lifting too heavy during warm-up sets. Conditioning included double-unders and wall balls. I did just enough to stay ahead of the 55+ Masters athlete in the lane next to me. Fair game.

Coach’s Notes: Barbell days are like comfort food—you crave them, you feel good doing them, but too much and you’re avoiding the veggies. If your training is built entirely around what you like, don’t be surprised when progress stalls.

Day 2 – Tuesday: Rig Day. Nope.

Woke up early, opened FitBox, saw the words “ring muscle-up progressions” and immediately closed the app. Texted the group chat: “Anyone feel cooked? Might just need an active recovery day.” Did not recover actively. Spent 17 minutes watching Instagram tutorials on false grip then grabbed a pastry and swore I’d “drop into open gym” later. I did not.

Coach’s Notes: There’s one gymnastics focussed class a week. One. If that’s the one you skip, what are you really avoiding? It’s not just the skill—it’s the discomfort of being a beginner. But here’s the thing: every skill you suck at now can become a strength… if you just show up.

Day 3 – Wednesday: Olympic Lifting, Obviously

Snatch triples. You already know I was there 20 minutes early, filming from two angles like I was heading to Regionals. Didn’t PR, but I almost hit one ugly rep that technically counts if we round up and dim the lights. The conditioning looked like a sprint but turned into a death trap of box jump overs and burpees. I strategically “tied my shoes” in round three to reset my soul.

Coach’s Notes: Your Olympic lifts aren’t the problem. The problem is you’re building a beautiful car and refusing to put an engine in it. Conditioning days matter—especially when they come after the fun part.

Day 4 – Thursday: The Great Disappearing Act

EMOM with rowing, strict handstand push-ups, and GHD sit-ups. I was “super keen” the night before. Even set out my clothes. Woke up with mysterious “shoulder tightness” that only flares up when upside-down. Decided to stretch instead. Then foam roll. Then scroll Instagram. Felt guilty, so I did three planks and 20 air squats and called it “a bodyweight flow.” Didn’t log it.

Coach’s Notes: The workouts you talk yourself out of are the ones you probably need the most. Strict gymnastics is the foundation for all kipping movements—and shoulder health, too. Don’t be afraid of low reps and hard work. It’s where strength lives.

Day 5 – Friday: Ego vs Engine

Long chipper. Row, box jumps, toes-to-bar, and dumbbell snatches. I thought about coming in late and just “doing the strength piece”... except there wasn’t one. I stared at the whiteboard like it personally insulted me. Eventually showed up, did the workout with “mindful pacing,” which was basically slow motion. Finished 3 minutes after the rest of the class. Told everyone I “needed to work on aerobic base anyway.”

Coach’s Notes: Your engine won’t build itself. It’s built in the long, grinding workouts you pretend don’t count. You can’t outlift poor conditioning—especially in CrossFit. Turn up, even when it’s not your kind of fun.

Day 6 – Saturday: Partner WOD – Strategic Pairing

Booked in early. Love a partner WOD. Tried to subtly pair with someone who “loves cardio” (i.e., will do most of the work). They saw through me and split everything evenly. Rude. Midway through, I considered faking a cramp. Pushed through instead. Felt surprisingly good. Realised I could probably do more… if I stopped avoiding it all week.

Coach’s Notes: Partner WODs aren’t just for hiding behind someone else’s fitness. They’re for realising you can push harder. If you dread suffering alone, use Saturdays as your entry point to effort. Just… pull your weight.

Day 7 – Sunday: Reflective Rest (Sort Of)

Rest day. I earned it… I think? Did a quick audit of the week: two heavy days, one sort-of metcon, and a hard pass on gymnastics. So... technically “active”? Thought about next week’s goals. Wrote: “Show up to gymnastics.” Then crossed it out and wrote: “Mobility.” Then rewrote: “Okay fine. Just do the damn class.”

Coach’s Notes: Awareness is progress. So is honesty. Reflecting on your week can be uncomfortable, but it’s where growth starts. If you know you’re avoiding something—write it down, commit to it, and walk in the door next time it shows up.

Closing Coach’s Message

“If You Always Do What You’ve Always Done…”

We get it—gymnastics is humbling. The rig doesn’t lie. There’s no faking a strict pull-up or half-committing to a handstand hold. It’s uncomfortable, it’s slow progress, and it requires actual patience.

But here's the truth: the movements you avoid are usually the ones that will change you the most.

Barbells are great. We love a heavy day. But gymnastics teaches you control, awareness, strength, and resilience in ways that barbells never will. So next time you see “rig work” on the board, take a deep breath… and show up anyway. You don’t need to crush it. You just need to be there.

Growth doesn’t come from cherry-picking. It comes from confronting the stuff you’d rather skip.

See you under the rig.

SImmo.

Top 5 Excuses to Avoid Gymnastics

• “I’m just not built for gymnastics.”
  Translation: “I don’t want to feel like a beginner again.”

• “I’ve got a bit of a shoulder niggle.”
  Translation: “I didn’t warm up and now I’m scared of wall walks.”

• “I’m saving myself for a heavy day.”
  Translation: “I only like workouts where I already look strong.”

• “I’ll just work on it in open gym.”
  Translation: “I will absolutely not work on it in open gym.”

• “I’d come, but I don’t want to hold up the class.”
  Translation: “I’d come, but I don’t want to face the rig.”

Why Gymnastics Builds More Than Just Muscles

Gymnastics isn’t just about getting upside-down or flying through the rings. It builds:

- Core control that transfers into every other movement 
- Joint strength that keeps you safe under load 
- Midline awareness that makes Olympic lifting easier 
- Confidence in your body (even if you never leave the ground) 
- A growth mindset, because progress in gymnastics is earned in inches

You can’t fake gymnastics. You have to earn it. And that’s why it’s powerful.

Make Peace with the Rig: The Checklist

[ ] Book into the gymnastics class ahead of time

[ ] Tell your coach you’re working on it (Accountability!)

[ ] Scale the skill properly—leave the ego at the door

[ ] Track your progress (Every rep matters. Write it down.)

[ ] Commit to 1 gymnastics session per week, minimum

[ ] Celebrate effort, not just outcomes

[ ] Remind yourself: The rig doesn’t bite. It builds.